To our children and future generations:
We want to begin this note to you with a large dose of humility and transparency.
We were ill-prepared in our own lives to ask the right financial questions with wisdom. We lived during a time when the prevailing American mindset was to live for today and trust that tomorrow would somehow take care of itself. There was value in that outlook, an appreciation for presence, for experience, for not postponing life indefinitely.
But living in the present does not negate the need for wise planning for the future.
This letter is written with the hope that you might learn from our mistakes and, in doing so, spare yourselves and your children some of the financial insecurity we have faced at vulnerable moments in our lives.
What follows is not theory. It is reality as we now understand it.
What a middle-class life will realistically require
To maintain what most people would call a middle-class lifestyle, stable housing, reliable transportation, healthcare, modest travel, and the ability to help family, most planners estimate retirees will need 70–80% of their final working income.
In today’s dollars, that looks roughly like this:
• Final income of $75,000 → retirement need of $52,000–$60,000 per year
• Final income of $100,000 → $70,000–$80,000 per year
• Final income of $150,000 → $105,000–$120,000 per year
Social Security currently provides, on average, about $23,000 per year per person. For many households, that leaves an income gap of $30,000–$80,000 annually that must come from savings or other income.
Using a conservative withdrawal rate, filling that gap requires approximately:
• $30,000 per year → $750,000 in savings
• $50,000 per year → $1.25 million
• $80,000 per year → $2 million
And these numbers are expressed in today’s dollars. Twenty to thirty years from now, the purchasing power required will be significantly higher.
How much should be saved, and when
Very broadly:
• Those retiring in 10 years need aggressive saving, often 20–30% of income plus existing assets.
• Those retiring in 20 years should aim for 15–20%, increasing contributions over time.
• Those retiring in 30 years still have compounding on their side, but only if they begin now and steadily increase toward 20% or more.
The single most costly mistake we made was treating retirement funds as flexible. Early withdrawals do not just remove money, they remove decades of future growth.
The reality of healthcare and aging
This was our greatest blind spot.
Medicare does not eliminate major costs. Premiums, supplemental plans, prescriptions, deductibles, and chronic condition care add up quickly. Long-term care, whether in-home help, assisted living, or skilled nursing, is often largely out-of-pocket.
Many retirees will spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on healthcare and care needs over the final decades of life.
The most expensive years of life are often the last ones.
One practical decision we did make, and are grateful for, was to pre-arrange and prepay our burial costs. It was one of those things that was easy to avoid thinking about, but we did not want it to become a weight you would have to carry later.
The cost was significant, around $12,000, and we know families in the future will face much higher numbers. We feel peace knowing this part is settled.
Income loss happens faster than expected
One of the hardest transitions for us was going from full-time six-figure incomes to a dual Social Security income that was roughly half of what we earned while working.
Eventually, one of us will lose the other’s income entirely.
That forces a question no one wants to ask late:
Is there enough left for one person to survive securely when they need it most?
Helping your own children
One of the greatest gifts you can give your children is early financial fluency.
Practical tools many families use:
• Greenlight or GoHenry for budgeting and saving habits
• Fidelity Youth Accounts for early investing education
• 529 plans or UNest for education savings
• Simple goal-based savings systems that make money visible and intentional
Teaching children how money works compounds just as powerfully as interest does.
Questions worth asking now
• What do I want my life to look like at 60, 70, and beyond?
• Do I want to age in place, downsize, or live near family?
• How would I fund in-home care or assisted living if needed?
• Have I planned for a period when I may not be able to advocate for myself?
• Do I have a will, healthcare directive, and power of attorney in place?
• Have I clearly documented my end-of-life wishes so my family is not left guessing?
• What financial or emotional burdens might I unintentionally leave behind?
These are not morbid questions. They are acts of care.
A final word
We want to end where we began, with humility.
We have not arrived at financial wisdom. We are very much a work in progress. But we now understand that clarity brings peace, and avoidance only compounds stress.
So if there is one final encouragement we hope you’ll hear, it is this:
Take time now to seek professional financial advice.
The time to plan is now.
With love, humility, and hope.
Dad and Mom
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